{WARNING: I HAVE BAD MEMORY AND MOST OF THE FOLLOWING COME FROM MY NOTES AND NOT DIRECT QUOTES SO IT'S MOSTLY MY IMPRESSION OF WHAT WAS BEING SAID RATHER THAN WHAT WAS ACTUALLY BEING SAID}
We sang some 'worship music' and a man named Dan Haugh spoke Thursday evening. He talked about how you can't be Superman. He talked about how you can't be in ministry, especially working with youth, and be two different people. You need to open up to expect the youth to open up. I did get a couple of the quotes he used:
"All the persons of faith I know are sinners, doubters, and uneven performers.
We are secure not because we are sure of ourselves but because we trust that God is sure of us."
-Eugene Peterson
"Those who think they are finished, are finished. Those who think they have arrived, have lost their way. Those who think they have reached ther goals, they have missed it. Those who think they are saints, are demons."
-Henry Nauer
I really liked those. I also had something written on the side of my page of notes from that day. Not sure what triggered it but it was just a passing thought that I wrote down:
"To sleep, perhaps to dream. But why only dream in your sleep? Isn't it better to dream awake; to remember, reflect, and grow?"
Anyway... enough of that. After Dan was done speaking we all went out for "TexMex" and had more in depth conversations. I'll be honest, there were a few points in that night where I felt really awkward. We were all sitting at a long table and on my side of the table I was surrounded by pastors. I wasn't entirely sure what they were talking about half the time and then I did recognize some of the conversation, I still didn't feel I had anything to contribute. Especially with me still not entirely sure where I stand on this religion thing. (just realized I was supposed to blog about all that and never did). But then we all split up, Pat and I went back to the hotel and had some serious conversations. It was good. We used to talk and hang out a lot before Life Bridge and YASO got started and the last two years, anytime we get together it's a meeting or something. It was nice to sit and just talk and bullshit like we used to.
Friday we all had breakfast together at the church. Neil was awesome enough to pick up a bunch of breakfast things (including the cinnamon rolls I requested the night before) and someone brought a box of coffee from Starbucks. Then Holly Rankin Zaher spoke. She talked about failure. We played a game where we all got in two circles (one on the outside, one on the inside) facing each other and took turns telling a story about a particular time in our lives we felt like a failure. Then we switched partners and told this story from different perspectives each time. We told it from first hand perspective, the perspective of a journalist, someone with rose colored glasses, and reflective optimism. [i'm not sure that last one is accurate but that's how it turned out when i did it]. It's not the story, it's the perception of the story. If you step outside your story, where are you? Real people fail, and succeed. You are not your failures or successes.
"When everybody's super-no one is."
-The Incredibles
"Ever tried.
Ever failed.
No matter.
Try again.
Fail again.
Fail better."
-Samuel Beckett
What would you attempt to do if you knew you could no fail??
After Holly spoke we all went out for lunch at Whole Foods. That was an experience in itself. I never knew you could eat at a grocery store like that. Although I was very disappointed in the fact that they do not have caffiene in any of the sodas/pop. I did get to feed a potato to a one-legged bird though so that was cool.
We went back to the church after lunch and Phil Shepherd spoke about taking time for yourself to Rest, Dream, and Create. I'm just going to include my notes from this part. They're pretty self explanitory.
"Cultivate dreams without rejecting reality. Define yourself by light, rather than darkness. I want the best for them, why don't I want the best for me? Love what you see in the mirror. Love yourself before you can love others." Everyone was talking about how they don't really take time for themselves. When they read they read theology books. When they do something they're always working some how. I feel like I don't work enough. The only books I read are for myself. I go dancing, I go to concerts, I go to game and LARP, I go to Karaoke, and I feel like I don't do enough for others. I don't work enough where everyone else there works too much.
After Phil spoke, Neil got on stage. Neil Christopher is my new friend I mentioned earlier. He was the mastermind behind evoyouth. He is a pastor in Ft Worth, Texas and has a youth group and was tired of being alone. So he got a bunch of other pastors (and me and a couple other non-pastors) together to find a way to not be lonely anymore. Neil told his story. It's not mine to share so I'm not going to be posting what he shared. I will tell you, he made me cry a little. I am very proud to call Neil my new friend. Everyone else at evoyouth was very welcoming and very kind. I don't know what it is about him but Neil has this spark to him that I can relate to, even though I can't quite pinpoint what it is. My favorite part about Neil's 'speech' was this indirect quote,
"At least in a loony bin, you may be crazy- but you're not alone."
Friday night a few of us went to Phil's house. We sat around and talked about everything from squirrels, to Glee, to Twilight, to Christopher Moore. Then Pat, Paul, Neil and myself went to a local bar called the Chatroom. It was a blast! When you first walk in, it's a little intimidating, and a little confusing. It's like, no one could figure out what kind of bar it was, so everybody went. There are bikers, hipsters, old people, young people, gay people, mexicans, and dogs. yes, there were two dogs running around the bar. The music on the jukebox was so random it was comical. There was a man selling tacos for $3 (BEST TACOS EVER!) and a girl who knew Neil brought a bunch of cupcakes to our table. Actually, I think just about everyone in that hole-in-the-wall, dive bar, knew Neil. And it was fantastic. I met some amazing people at the bar that night. I think I talked more to the people in the bar than I did at the actual convention. It was so surprising how welcoming and friendly everyone was. It's gotta be a Texas thing.
The next day, Pat and I flew back to Chicago.
That was my trip. It was interesting, fun, eventful, inspiring, and fufilling.
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