Gossip. I know I shouldn't let it bother me, and normally I don't. Normally I revel in it. I don't mind people spreading rumors or talking shit or even blaming me for things I didn't do. So why is it that my feelings are actually hurt by this. Why this time? Is it the source? I mean, the people who usually start shit are people I don't particularly care for. But, is it because it's someone I believe to be a friend and I truely care for, that it hurts more?
People have made fun, talked shit, spread rumors, and back stabbed me for as long as I can remember. Anyone from my peers, to judgmental adults, to friends. So why am I surprised? I've had enough experience with it that I can get a feeling about people. If I get a feeling that a particular person is going to stab me in the back down the line I typically avoid that person. But in this situation I tried to do that, and I felt bad about it. I felt like I was the one being the child and that I should have more faith in people. I felt guilty so I let it go. I ignored it. And what happened? That's right- I got hurt. This person started talking about me behind my back and because I pretended everything was fine and I let my guard down, it took me by surprise. If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and sounds like a duck... it's not a chicken.
Now, this is just me venting. I have such a bad memory I will probably forget this ever happened in about a week.
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